Humor

GO SEE THIS MOVIE!  I went in to this movie fearing it would be as bad as “The Dukes of Hazzard,” but I was wonderfully surprised, and I think you will be too.  This truly was an epic movie, and I didn’t have any issue adjusting to the new actors playing the well-established characters of B.A., Murdock, Face, and the Colonel.  They even brought back the VAN! 

Since the original story line from the 1980′s TV show wouldn’t work now (being a group of Vietnam Vets would put them a little on the “old” side), the movie re-establishes the history of the team during a 15-minute introduction sequence.  From there, it is a series action scenes, wise cracks, and complicated puzzles to be figured out until the climatic conclusion.  I will caution that there is a little foul language in the movie, but much of it is implied or muffled (intentionally) by explosions or other noises.  Beyond that, I see no reason why young audiences who can tolerate movie violence could not see this film. 

Lastly, I do encourage that you stay through the end of the movie, as there is some bonus features at the end.  Enjoy!

This funny. I’m sure your office, like mine, have some strange rules and procedures. Maybe you have to separate your paper waste from the rest of your trash, or maybe you have to put in a request for the next years calendar two months before the year ends. Well, how about these rules?

According to the Boston Sunday Herald of October 5, 1958, a Beantown office manager, cleaning out a file in preparation for his firm’s move to a new location, came across these office rules for 1872.

EIGHT RULES FOR OFFICE WORKERS 1872

l. Office employees each day will fill lamps, clean chimneys and trim wicks. Wash windows once a week.

2. Each clerk will bring in a bucket of water and a scuttle of coal for the day’s business.

3. Make your pens carefully. You may whittle nibs to your individual taste.

4.Men employees will be given an evening off each week for courting purposes, or two evenings a week if they go regularly to church.

5. After thirteen hours of labor in the office, the employee should spend the remaining time reading the Bible and other good books.

6. Every employee should lay aside from each pay day a goodly sum of his earnings for his benefit during his declining years so that he will not become a burden on society.

7. Any employee who smokes Spanish cigars, uses liquor in any form, or frequents pool and public halls or gets shaved in a barber shop, will give good reason to suspect his worth, intentions, integrity and honesty.

8. The employee who has performed his labor faithfully and without fault for five years, will be given an increase of five cents per day in his pay, providing profits from business permits it.

Quoted from The World of Business, edited by Edward C. Bursk, Donald T. Clark, and Ralph Hidy (New York: Simon and Schuster, 1962), 1374-1375.

I don’t know if you check the NFL.com website to view game stats, but if you do you might have noticed a huge error.  Looking at the live game stats during the Pro Bowl, I noticed they had the divisional teams labeled incorrectly.  If you look at the screen shot below, notice the players listed under the divisional titles.

That’s right.  According to the NFL, Aaron Rodgers (Quarterback for the Minnesota Vikings) is a member of AFC.  The same holds true for Donovan McNabb, Quarterback of the Philadelphia Eagles.  I wonder when they will notice their error.

In keeping with the holiday season, I bring you one of the funniest choirs I’ve ever seen. These silent monks “sing” the Hallelujah chorus during a holiday pageant. I give these teens a lot of credit. So take a few moments, kick back, and enjoy the video.

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I received an e-mail with the following puns, and I just had to share.  It is impressive how people can come up with these.  My brother is a “punny” person at times, and he can keep a chain of puns going during a lengthy conversation.  I lack that ability, which might be why I find these so funny.

The e-mail credits the DFW Writers’ Conference, though I did not find the list (or any reference to puns) on their website.

Enjoy!

1. The roundest knight at King Arthur’s round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.

2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian .

3. She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.

4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it was a weapon of math disruption.

5. No matter how much you push the envelope, it’ll still be stationery.

6. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.

7. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.

8. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.

9. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

10. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.

11. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

12. Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other, You stay here; I’ll go on a head.’

13. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.

14. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: ‘Keep off the Grass.’

15. A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was, a nurse said, ‘No change yet.’

16. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.

17. The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.

18. The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.

19. A backward poet writes inverse.

20. In democracy it’s your vote that counts. In feudalism it’s your count that votes.

This comic strip is so true!

I am one of those coworkers with little toys on my desk (one from one of my bosses).  My favorite is a simple 3-D puzzle made out of plastic blocks, requiring you to figure out how to assemble them together to make a predetermined shape.  On the really stressful days, taking a minute to play with the puzzle seems to lift the mood.  Even my coworkers will come over and play with the puzzle while talking about work.

Unfortunately, there are a few coworkers that frown on making the office environment “fun.”  I can understand that (to an extent), since I don’t like listening to my coworkers music or their telephone conversations down the hall from my office.  But toys?  Toys are harmless! 

I do think that there should be a limit on the amount of novelty on the desk though, but more for practical reasons that for the distraction aspect.  If you cannot spread out your paperwork and your files since your action figures or desktop putting green are in the way, then you have too many toys on your desk.  Just take a few of the items off the desk, and then rotate them in and out over the course of the month.  That will put the “novel” back into “novelty.”

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One of the many Super Bowl commercials.  This one depicts Mencia teaching an English class to a bunch of foreign nationals.  Enjoy!

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After listening to the news coverage today of all the snow that Amarillo, Texas was receiving, it reminded me of a not-so-cold video about Amarillo I saw a year ago.  Back in 2005, members of the Royal Dragoon Guard serving in Al Faw, Iraq took some free time to film a spoof video to the song “Is this the way to Amarillo” before returning home from their 6 month tour.  When the video was e-mailed to their friends back in London, the video demand ended up crashing the Ministry of Defenses server.  No harm was done, and no one was punished for their actions.

And now, it is my pleasure to bring you the best music video ever to come out of Iraq!

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